Voyager Probe Badly Broken After Smashing Into Last Part Of Universe

PASADENA, CA—Confirming that several machinery had broken off the craft and that the majority of its scientific instrument were no longer operational, officials from NASA’s Jet Propulsion Laboratory announce that Voyager 1, the pioneering space probe launched in 1977, had been sternly damaged Thursday after crashing into the finish of the universe. “It appears that, at approximately 8:20 this morning, Voyager strike the edge of the universe head-on at a speed of 38,000 miles per hour, resultant in important structural damage to the spacecraft,” said Voyager project scientist Ed Stone,

 noting that the force of the impact with the outer edge of the cosmos had bent the probe’s main aerial dish and totally snapped off its low-field magnetometer. “While we’re in receipt of only intermittent signals from Voyager now, received data indicate that, in addition to nearly count the craft’s thermoelectric generator, the collision left a significant dent in the end of the universe as well.” JPL scientists added that Voyager 1 now appear to be moving laterally, scraping its left side along the universe’s outer edge, and that it is predictable to continue doing so for the next 50 or 60 years until the residual fragments of the probe eventually come to relax in the bottom-right corner of outer-space.